We went with some friends to a small children's museum this morning. When we got there it was a little crowded in the main room. Most of the kids there were in the age range that is suggested (around 2-5), but there were a couple of older kids. Now I don't have any problem with older kids in a space designed or suggested for younger kids. I don't know these children. There is always the possibility that there is something going on with them that I don't know about and perhaps that age range is perfect for them. Or they could be there with younger siblings who are within that age range. Who knows, right?
When the two older kids start making it hard for the other kids to use the toys, is when I start to look around for the parents. This morning there were several kids crowded around a really fun station that was filled with paper pulp and projected a color, almost like a topographical map, based on how big of a pile of pulp is in any spot in the basin. The older kids were acting inappropriately with the pulp and since there was no parental intervention to stop the older kids, I asked my child to stop what she was doing and step away.
We usually encourage our children to play independently and to be friendly with other kids when we go places (within reason and ability). So when I had to remove her from something she was really interested in, I was a little ticked off. The parents of the two older kids were deep in conversation, not really watching the kids at all. I understand completely how you can be caught up and not notice your child doing something that is making it hard for others to enjoy the space. No big deal, we all have these moments. The parents did eventually notice their children's undesirable behavior when most of the other kids were being asked by their parents to leave that station.
Fast forward thirty minutes in a different room called "the relaxation room". Let me just say what a great idea this is for a children's museum. Not all kids like the stimulation overload a children's museum provides. This quiet peaceful room is filled all sorts of relaxing things: colored pencils and mosaic coloring books, a box of little tags with helpful things to do for others, a reading corner, yoga cards and mats, soft relaxing music and lighting, and a water painting table. The same set of older kids were already in the room when we walked in. This time there are NO parents in the room at all. I understand if your kids move onto another room before you get there, but no less than five minutes after we walk in, still nothing.
Initially, the older kids were jumping around and yelling. Not exactly what this room dictates, but not something that is restricted in a children's play zone. They then proceed to start karate chopping and kicking one of the pop-out displays demonstrating a yoga pose. At that point I calmly and politely said, "No, thank you. That is not very nice." They both turned around and looked at me. Is that violent behavior something they reserve for when no adults are around? They walked out of the room.
Did I go too far by saying something? I try so hard not to judge other parents. I know this whole post is basically judging their parenting style (or lack thereof). But, I want to set a good example for my kids and kicking and punching a paper cartoon boy doing yoga goes against the rules of the museum. Should I always be the one removing my children when someone else's kids aren't behaving appropriately? Is that the example I want to set for her? And how long were those parents going to let their kids roam unsupervised in a children's museum that they were likely 5 years too old to be at?
I know if I were in that situation, I would be glad someone set my kids straight. It takes a village!